Born again christians are NOT special.
The hate i have for born again christians is great. So great, that Anakin Skywalker would be jealous of my hate. He'd look at me and go "fuck, that is some angry angry hate. I wish i could have summoned that much hate when i force choked padme because that made no sense whatsoever in episode III"
I went on a websearch for a definition of a born again christians. hightruth.com states that "only Jesus can enliven you by bringing the life of God into you to give you a new birth, a new life. Only thus can you be born again to be a Christian, a Christ-man, an adherent of Jesus Christ, full of life, joy, peace, rest, purpose, and fulfillment in God."
Awesome. May the God be with you.
Let me turn this into a mathematical equation.
Let A = some sad cookie cutter loser who can't get laid.
Let B= Jesus
Let C= the life story of A involving B
Let D= me wanting to punch A into the face.
A + C = D^99999999999999999999999
There is one thing i hate more than born again christians, and that's the stories they tell.
It always goes like this:
"I was some sad cookie cutter loser who couldn't get laid.
BUT THEN, i found Jesus. now my life rocks. I am special. I shall now sing a song about it to you"
1) they are still not getting laid. instead they pray and bake cookies while singing a song about praying and baking cookies
2) your song sucks
3) your song sucks balls
WTF is up with finding Jesus? Last time i checked he hasn't been seen for approximately 2005 years and 6 months. Guess what? YOU DIDN'T FIND JESUS. You are WRONG. On top of that, i have a newsflash.
*NEWFLASH*
You are not special. Not even in the "my mom says i'm special" way.
There are a few million of you crappy born again christians, and that makes you unspecial. Your story about your life is crap and I'd rather watch the Wiggles perform their pirate song while continously rolling in broken glass than hear your bitch-ass life story. Shut the fuck up. Those children in wheelchairs with Down syndrome, THEY are special. you are not. and NO, pretending you have Down syndrome and riding a wheelchair will not make you it either. But you should try, because then it'll be easier to beat you in the head with that big-ass statue of Mary i stole from the rose gardens.
I hate born again christians.
I went on a websearch for a definition of a born again christians. hightruth.com states that "only Jesus can enliven you by bringing the life of God into you to give you a new birth, a new life. Only thus can you be born again to be a Christian, a Christ-man, an adherent of Jesus Christ, full of life, joy, peace, rest, purpose, and fulfillment in God."
Awesome. May the God be with you.
Let me turn this into a mathematical equation.
Let A = some sad cookie cutter loser who can't get laid.
Let B= Jesus
Let C= the life story of A involving B
Let D= me wanting to punch A into the face.
A + C = D^99999999999999999999999
There is one thing i hate more than born again christians, and that's the stories they tell.
It always goes like this:
"I was some sad cookie cutter loser who couldn't get laid.
BUT THEN, i found Jesus. now my life rocks. I am special. I shall now sing a song about it to you"
1) they are still not getting laid. instead they pray and bake cookies while singing a song about praying and baking cookies
2) your song sucks
3) your song sucks balls
WTF is up with finding Jesus? Last time i checked he hasn't been seen for approximately 2005 years and 6 months. Guess what? YOU DIDN'T FIND JESUS. You are WRONG. On top of that, i have a newsflash.
*NEWFLASH*
You are not special. Not even in the "my mom says i'm special" way.
There are a few million of you crappy born again christians, and that makes you unspecial. Your story about your life is crap and I'd rather watch the Wiggles perform their pirate song while continously rolling in broken glass than hear your bitch-ass life story. Shut the fuck up. Those children in wheelchairs with Down syndrome, THEY are special. you are not. and NO, pretending you have Down syndrome and riding a wheelchair will not make you it either. But you should try, because then it'll be easier to beat you in the head with that big-ass statue of Mary i stole from the rose gardens.
I hate born again christians.
posted by Us at
7:27 PM
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